Sunday, February 6, 2011

Soon Barbie Was Begging Ken to Try on Her Spandex Miniskirt

I'm told that Billmon is blogging again. Billmon was Bush's best vivisectionist when watching Bush get vivisected was vicarious fun! He once did me a Kind, hat-tipping me to Atrios who then linked to me for a catch I had on Lee Siegel during the long ago fuss over Siegel's sock-puppetry. I got over 40K hits that day, more, at that time, then I had total in three years of blogging.

Both of those links I discovered yesterday within twenty minutes. Awestruck praise to Serendipity for providing the perfect Heh! to end Blogroll Amnesty Weekend (and all the bleggalgazing that comes with it).

UPDATE! Quin tells me (and thank you, Quin) that isn't Billmon. To be honest, I took Duncan's word for it, saw the author as b, and ran for the serendipity like the addict I am.

UPDATE! Duncan confirms it isn't Billmon. Wishful thinking on both our parts. All praise to Serendipity, who set me up Kindly.

Hey, look who I found!

Here are the newbies on the blegroll:


Denise Duhamel

They decide to exchange heads.
Barbie squeezes the small opening under her chin 
over Ken's bulging neck socket. His wide jaw line jostles
atop his girlfriend's body, loosely,
like one of those novelty dogs
destined to gaze from the back windows of cars.
The two dolls chase each other around the orange Country Camper 
unsure what they'll do when they're within touching distance. 
Ken wants to feel Barbie's toes between his lips, 
take off one of her legs and force his whole arm inside her.
With only the vaguest suggestion of genitals,
all the alluring qualities they possess as fashion dolls, 
up until now, have done neither of them much good. 
But suddenly Barbie is excited looking at her own body 
under the weight of Ken's face. He is part circus freak,
part thwarted hermaphrodite. And she is imagining 
she is somebody else—maybe somebody middle class and ordinary,
maybe another teenage model being caught in a scandal.

The night had begun with Barbie getting angry 
at finding Ken's blow up doll, folded and stuffed
under the couch. He was defensive and ashamed, especially about 
not having the breath to inflate her. But after a round
of pretend-tears, Barbie and Ken vowed to try
to make their relationship work. With their good memories 
as sustaining as good food, they listened to late-night radio 
talk shows, one featuring Doctor Ruth. When all else fails,
just hold each other, the small sex therapist crooned. 
Barbie and Ken, on cue, groped in the dark, 
their interchangeable skin glowing, the color of Band-Aids. 
Then, they let themselves go— Soon Barbie was begging Ken 
to try on her spandex miniskirt. She showed him how 
to pivot as though he was on a runway. Ken begged 
to tie Barbie onto his yellow surfboard and spin her 
on the kitchen table until she grew dizzy. Anything,
anything, they both said to the other's requests,
their mirrored desires bubbling from the most unlikely places.


  1. New album released week from this Tuesday. Only two tour stops so far in US - New York and San Francisco. Hope.

  2. Happy Zombie Reagan day!

    P.S. Bananaman makes me laugh.

  3. My future hell indeed. Thanks. I was wondering why it hadn't begun.

    Also. Ronald Raygun was one of the most evil people in the history of this nation. Just sayin'

  4. Hey BDR-- that's not Billmon posting over at MoA, but rather the community of commenters that opened up there after Billmon closed down comments on his blog after a certain point. The place is decorated to look like the old "Whisky Bar", though, so it's easy to understand the confusion. And last I had heard, it had shut down, so it's good to know it's back-- I found it a truly educational site before. By the way, Billmon did post a few times at DailyKOS fairly recently, but not for the past few months.

  5. Hey, you're welcome, BDR.

    By the way, I'll give you another update. Here's the text of the "Banana Man" ad you shared.

    [Banana ha haeteru]: I have bananas growing on me.
    [Kimi ya kanojo wo genki dzuketakute](just flashes for a split second): I want to give you and her confidence.
    [Ai amu Dole man]: I am DOLE MAN!

    I'm pretty sure the main actor is a very young Katori Shingo, but I can't be positive.