Thursday, July 5, 2012

To Encourage Pursuit of Intellectual Professions a City's Central Thoroughfare Might Be Called Mathematics Avenue, Neurochemistry Street, Jurisprudence Boulevard, or Lit Crit Street while at the Edge of Town the Thoroughways and By Ways Could Commemorate Abstractions and Generalized Conditions (as in Global Capital Street, Logic Throughway, Affluence Alley, Interruption Boulevard, Domination Interstate, Accumulation Highway)

Dig these three paragraphs:

But Regan bluntly asserted that Scottish football simply cannot afford to have Rangers outwith the top two tiers of the league structure, with his argument not confined to the commercial impact their absence would have.

“Without Rangers, there is social unrest and a big problem for Scottish society,” claimed Regan. “They have a huge fan base and to contemplate the situation where those fans don’t have a team to support, where those fans are effectively left without a game to follow, I just think that could lead to all sorts of issues, all sorts of problems for the game.

“Tribalism in football is really important. It is part of the game. People follow their clubs with pride, it is passed down from generation to generation. There are thousands of Rangers fans whose fathers and parents and grandfathers have been Rangers fans. You can’t contemplate a situation without that and if Rangers weren’t to exist that could have real dire consequences."

Dig this paragraph:

“Do this research. If we don’t have a season, watch how much evil, which we call it crime, watch how much crime picks up when you take away our game,”  [Ray Lewis] said.

Ray Lewis was referring to the poor who'd lose a vitally important source of income schlepping beer up and down aisles for fucks like me if stadiums lost their two preseason and eight regular season home games (see here, and call me when a Villager asks Obama about this and he bwahahas), the Scottish fuck worried that out-of-tribe peasants will inconvenience the rich with tribal violence normally flood-channeled into hating Celtic. Still, it's an interesting contrast and compare, the metaphors finely abounding.

UPDATE! Fuckyousaurus Rex.


Lyn Hejinian

The Lost Pines Inn would be a good name for a motel, or No Sheep in the Meadow, The Lost Egos, The Downtown Country Inn, Mike and Ann's, Doug and Diane's, Bob and Joe's or Just Joe's Hotel, Warm Toes Hotel, Anything Goes Inn, The Come Inn, The Company Retreat, The Hermit's Den, La Cave, The Little House Hotel, The Reliquary, The Happy Family Inn, The Rooster's Coop, The Corky Floor, The Henhouse Hotel, The Egg-in-a-Nest, The Rooks Retreat, The Cooks Inn, The Beat A Retreat, and a music group could call itself Crested Loader, or 10-Second Crossing, or 9 Car Train, or Thumb on the Space Bar, or the Unlike Minimums, The Shepherds Without Sheep, Sheep Without Sleep, Two Feminines, Autism, The Twice Maniacs, The Genetics, The Nasty Uncles, Interfering Women, but streets get named typically after numbers or trees of they're given the names of prominent as well as lesser-known citizens or the names of great cities of the world or the great letters of the alphabet from A to Z but in celebration of the things we consume the names of products and objects should be given to some streets (Tagliatelle Lane, Glue Stick Street, iPod Alley) and to encourage pursuit of intellectual professions a city's central thoroughfare might be called Mathematics Avenue, Neurochemistry Street, Jurisprudence Boulevard, or Lit Crit Street while at the edge of town the thoroughways and by ways could commemorate abstractions and generalized conditions (as in Global Capital Street, Logic Throughway, Affluence Alley, Interruption Boulevard, Domination Interstate, Accumulation Highway) and another great name for a motel would be The Soporif's Inn, or The Archive, and Duke, High Spot, Drummer, Archimedes, Shadow, Ranger, and Gamelon might name some of the 220 horses at work under the hood of the blue 2003 220-horse power P.T. Cruiser that got me home by bedtime.


  1. Link thanks, but how will Scotland ever recover from the inevitable bout of wild Pictish abandon?

  2. You're drooling over men in shorts, using words like gorgeous, and don't know who Aaron Sorkin is? Who are you?

  3. Heh. OK, so I summon the google and read the Sorkin wrote (or was involved with) *A Few Good Men* (never heard of it), *The American President* (never heard of it), *The West Wing* (heard of it, never saw an episode), *Sports Night* (heard of it just before it was cancelled, was recommended to me, but never saw it), *Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip* (never heard of it), *Charlie Wilson's War* (remember hearing about it, never saw it), *The Social Network* (never heard of it), and *Moneyball* (heard of it, never saw it). But that Portland Timber green home kit is almost as gorgeous as their red away kit.

    I'd never heard of Sorkin until the release of his new movie (or if I had as background sound, it didn't register). Sherwood Schwartz, yes, Sorkin, no.

  4. A friend gave her 13 year old a list of movies she is required to see so that she will understand the cultural references. Um, you're missing a lot. Including in poetry, music, and conversation. Just sayin'

  5. Me, too. Here's a dollop on top:

    Saw Luna here in ATL soon after moving, maybe their last tour. Britta's family's from here, I think. One of the greatest nights of my life, as you might put it. As someone said, plays guitar like a god but sings like Kermit the Frog. Now, don't tell me you don't know who KtF is!

    Also too:

    Long live Sterling Morrison.

  6. Of course I'm missing a lot. I bitch about it daily. Only so much time, I choose as best I can. You're fortunate to grasp it all.