Tuesday, November 19, 2024

The Blue Tablet Under My Tongue Was Melting

Some huge personal news - I finished the latest Boorum & Pease 300 page quadrille notebook and (have already cut the pages from the tablet and fed them to the Iron Mountain shredding bin to the left of the staff elevator on the third floor of Lauinger) am now using a 7.5"x9.5" Moleskine quadrille hardcover tablet, a major life change after ten straight Boorum & Peases. I've also reintroduced fountain pen ink and table salt into the hexjeffs

Revolution, yinz. I've dumped money into mutual funds every paycheck for 35 years via work, how and where do I move it without taxes into something other than the stock market before the new reign of kakistocratic kleptocrats engineer a bubble-burst and make gigazillions shorting the market? I have some small faith, I said to my tenured colleague, that between gross incompetence and even grosser avarice Team Trump will be busier sloppily looting the joint than executing us for this conversation; she has her doubts. I just turned 65 and signed-up for and am eligible to use the Medicare I've paid into the last 50 years, I expect that to disappear, and I'm eligible to draw on the Social Security I've paid into the last 50 years, I hope to wait until I'm 70 to draw on it, I said to her, and she said start taking it now, she's 62, says the minute she can she will. O, masking tape is back in the hexjeff rotation too



The abandonment of Boorum & Pease for the moleskine did not torment me for my disloyalty as once upon a time in the not distant past if not only would have but would have prevented the switch. Not an itch of buyer's regret, fuck me. The election had nothing to do with it, the clusterfuck had nothing to do with it, a too fat daypack did. Fine metaphors abound. Everybody chooses sides and the only side is you. Just as our shitlords desire 





Globalism Against Democracy
Going Forward from the Edge of the Abyss
On the Democratic Party's Cult of Powerlessness
"There is a cult of learned helplessness at the core of most American institutions, one that Trump punctured by appearing to be a man of action. And the Democratic Party in 2024, with its associated law firms, think tanks, elected officials, donors, and media outlets, was rejected by voters precisely because the core value on the left, center, and right is about embracing powerlessness"
Biden Ramps Up Nuclear Brinkmanship On His Way Out The Door
"As Biden himself repeatedly complained, Ukraine’s goal is to draw NATO directly in the war. That’s the purpose of this, it draws the US directly into war with Russia. From the Biden faction’s pov, better to leave Trump in direct war with Russia than let Trump cut Ukraine loose"
As Biden Leaves Office, the US Empire is Desperate to Maintain Its Hegemony
"Starmer excels as one thing: a grubby, cynical, craven politician – one utterly subservient to the American empire and its interests in the oil-rich Middle East"
Trying to Launch WWIII on the Way Out, Brandon Gives the Ukraine Permission to Attack Moscow with US Missiles
"It’s almost as if all these Cable News Libs and Resistance Historians™ who spent a decade cashing in on fascism panic while LARPing as the French resistance are ACTUALLY amoral grifters who believe in nothing but the wind’s direction and the health of their bank accounts!"
Influencers Are Going Full MAGA After Trump’s win
"Arab Americans, Ignore the Haters: Rejecting Kamala Harris was the Right Thing to Do"
"The upshot, manifested through electoralism, is a set of impossible choices. Why should we have to choose between abortion access and imperialism? Why does inflation need to be mitigated through the blood of Arabs? Why must a decent judicial system be contingent on genocide? Anybody accepting this logic has been duped into fighting the wrong enemy"
U.S. Foreign Aid Is Embarrassing Itself
"incredible to watch centrist after centrist do a variation of “if we just stop [thing democrats haven’t done in years] and instead do [thing democrats have been doing forever] then we would win.” I know from experience it’s tough watching your worldview get walloped, but come on"
USA Tries to Pound Lebanon Into Submission
"We are in a really bad situation. I don’t know how to make it better, but I do know we need to stop making ourselves actively stupider"
The Seeds of Social Revolution: Extreme Wealth Inequality
"This Nancy Mace thing is going to be a defining moment for the Democratic Party. Mace is deliberately bullying another person, one of their colleagues. And if House Dems are too chickenshit to defend their own colleague over this open, blatant hate, what the hell is the point of them anymore"
A Tale of Two PSYOPS
Primary objective of the Free-Speech Twitter PSYOP was to harness, corral, & establish control over the majority of the sizeable minority of people who refused to follow orders & pledge allegiance to the New Normal Reich when it was rolled out during the “Covid pandemic.” These people needed to be herded into a manipulable mass & redirected away from the global-capitalist empire & into a harmless cul-de-sac where they could scream & shout at the empire’s designated scapegoats to their heart’s content. Musk Cult was just a means of herding & leading them into this cul-de-sac
Capitalist Politics in Crisis
"Unlike her fellow right-wing Democrat Joe Biden, who was compelled to make “progressive” campaign promises by the Black Lives Matter rebellions, the left populism of the Bernie Sanders Campaign, and the mass protests against both Trump’s violent separating, caging, and deporting of migrants and the debacle of his handling of the pandemic. For her part, Kamala Harris offered the working class and oppressed groups nothing
A Republic to Keep, an Empire to Lose
"We should bear in mind that contemporary America has become hysteria prone"
Three LiberalismsThe Conservative Justices Bet Dobbs Wouldn’t Hurt Republicans Forever. They Were Right
"Our worst enemy is not Trump himself, but fatalism about our ability to stop him"
Worth a read, though he does not acknowledge the deliberate & performative uselessness of the Democratic Party
Organized OblivionCollapse Chronicles
"Using technology to help us hear these creatures out and witness their plight, the thinking goes, will shake us from the murderous apathy that has plagued our relationship with the natural world. Though past attempts at appealing to the better angels of our nature haven’t exactly stopped the slaughter, these techno-solutionists assure us that AI will allow us to resolve this problem of miscommunication once and for all by letting us hear straight from the literal horse’s mouth. We won’t be able to brush off the desperate pleas of these creatures any longer because they’ll be begging for their lives in fluent English"
The New Denial of Imperialism on the Left
Maggie'sFROM THE (trendy-tattered moleskin) NOTEBOOKS of PATIENCE THE BEAR
Helmetball, as always, the best metaphor for the United States of Assholes
On the Importance of Being Tasteless
Essential collections of ecopoetry{ feuilleton }'s
Brazen begging reminder: @blckdgrd.bsky.social
To the surprise of no one and to the annoyance of L a Swans binge in progress, this song, loud:





THE GOSPEL OF MARY

Mary Jo Bang

 I was living a life that was more
or less filled with misfiring synapses
inside a braincase. They said and said

and never stopped saying, “You are
that problem that can’t be undone,
a daughter that keeps becoming

what keeps her mother awake.” I was
in that moment mother to myself.
I was living a life filled with sky, gray

to cobalt blue, the robe that wraps
the day and keeps us together as long
as it lasts. I was living inside my head,

looking up, waiting to feel
an awakening but no angel came.
The blue tablet under my tongue

was melting. I was begging the sky
for rapture but all I could see
was a break in the clouds. The only in-

sight I had was what Horace said.
I read it in a book: we are owed
to death, we and whatever is ours.

3 comments:

  1. 1/let a thousand hexjeffs bloom

    2/speaking as an older retired person, with a spouse who is not yet retired yet though old enough to do so, with regard to my opinions and choices about financial issues as one ages, although i know not what the future holds of wonder or surprise:

    a/I think medicare and social security are very important to the economy and probably will be in operation as long as the supermarkets and warehouse stores are

    b/the higher social security payment if one defers until 70 is attractive to spouse if one doesn't actually need the money now

    c/the risk of stock market collapse is there, admittedly - but aside from shifting some of one's "securities" as they are called, although the name represents an aspiration rather than a reality, from stocks to bonds, spouse and self are just following the crowd - annuities are offered but are they really any safer?

    in my twenties i bought a turntable from a store that offered a lifetime warranty - the shortest lifetime in question was the store's, which was gone by the time the turntable could have used repair

    d/"one really owns only those things which would be safe in a shipwreck"

    e/rundgren & cuomo "down with the ship"

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-tw9geBHuwo

    ReplyDelete
  2. a large language model of my acquaintance asserts -- when prompted

    Mary Jo Bang's "The Gospel of Mary" has a unique blend of personal reflection, Biblical allusion, and philosophical inquiry which has resonated with readers and critics alike, sparking diverse interpretations and discussions. Some themes:

    Personal and Universal:

    Speaker's Struggle: The poem delves into the speaker's internal turmoil, characterized by feelings of inadequacy and alienation. The line "You are that problem that can't be undone" encapsulates this sense of being a burden.
    Motherhood and Self: The speaker's role as both a physical and spiritual mother to herself is a central motif. This reflects the complexities of motherhood and the challenges of self-identity.
    Spiritual Quest: The poem explores themes of spirituality and transcendence, as the speaker yearns for a higher power or a divine revelation. The blue tablet and the "break in the clouds" symbolize moments of potential enlightenment.

    Intertextuality and Allusion:

    Biblical References: The title "The Gospel of Mary" alludes to the Gnostic Gospel of Mary Magdalene, which focuses on Mary's spiritual insights. Bang's poem engages with this text, reimagining Mary's story for contemporary readers.
    Horace's Influence: The quotation from Horace, "we are owed to death, we and whatever is ours," introduces a Stoic perspective on mortality and acceptance. This contrasts with the speaker's desire for transcendence.

    Critical Perspectives:

    Feminist Readings: Some critics have interpreted the poem through a feminist lens, highlighting the speaker's experience as a woman and her struggle for autonomy and recognition.
    Psychological Analysis: Others have explored the poem's psychological depth, analyzing the speaker's internal conflicts and anxieties.
    Existential Themes: The poem's engagement with questions of meaning, purpose, and mortality aligns with existentialist thought.

    ReplyDelete
  3. google's large language model declines to speculate on the identity of the blue tablet, saying it could be dangerous, but chatgpt says:


    In Mary Jo Bang's poem "Gospel of Mary", the line "the blue tablet under my tongue was melting" likely refers to a specific type of medication. The imagery of a "blue tablet" melting under the tongue points to a medication that is either taken sublingually (under the tongue) or dissolves quickly in the mouth.

    Here are a few possibilities of what this could be referring to:

    Lorazepam (Ativan): Lorazepam is a blue pill, and it is a benzodiazepine commonly used to treat anxiety. While it is typically swallowed, some forms dissolve quickly under the tongue, which would fit the description of the tablet "melting."

    Nitroglycerin tablets: These are often used to treat chest pain or angina and come in small, blue pills that dissolve under the tongue. Nitroglycerin tablets are known for quickly dissolving when taken this way to provide rapid relief.

    Clonazepam (Klonopin): Another benzodiazepine that is blue in color and can be taken sublingually, although it's not always prescribed this way.

    Other Sublingual Medications: There are various medications, including those used for anxiety, panic attacks, or even pain management, that come in a dissolvable tablet form, some of which may be blue.

    In the context of the poem, the melting tablet might symbolize relief, numbing, or a moment of escape, but it could also allude to a deeper emotional or psychological experience, depending on the broader themes of the poem.

    ReplyDelete