Showing posts with label Dostoyevsky. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Dostoyevsky. Show all posts

Sunday, March 25, 2018

I Saw the Weaves of Glittermeat Airborne



THE PERFECT JOURNEY IS

A.R. Ammons

The perfect journey is
no need to go

another nothingly clear day and
I went 
to walk between the pine
colonnades
up the road on the hill and there
hill-high in dry cold
I saw the weaves of glittermeat
airborne, so fine,
the breeze sifting
figurations from the snow
reservoirs of the boughs

  • The Great Gardner / Gass War.
  • Bookmark and read thebluemoment.
  • Utah-ing.
  • Dan reviews Novel Explosives, a big fat novel liked by Steven Moore, who can sell me anything.
  • { feuilleton }'s weekly links.
  • I couldn't stop thinking about Crime & Punishment so I grabbed my copy of The Idiot, opened to a random page, and Myshkin is - get this! - feverish! It would have been Devils if I'd found it first, but fit over! thanks to an idiot.
  • If I ever rebrand, or start again, JPEOFPF!
  • Trademark pending, go buy it at godaddy while you can. Live as a fart onomatopoeia.
  • A word that always makes this happen:


Thursday, March 8, 2018

While Horseflies Harangue



  • That's my WFMU Swag-for-Life membership card, it's Marathon time, give them money.
  • A Popovich makes The OnionSeething after watching his players allow the wealthy to control the legislative process totally unopposed, head coach Gregg Popovich reportedly blasted the Spurs Wednesday for completely missing America’s descent into an oligarchy. “Wake up out there guys, how many times do I have to point out that trickle-down economics does nothing but consolidate wealth into the hands of the elite?” said Popovich, who furiously scrawled out a chart on his whiteboard that illustrated stagnant worker wage growth skyrocketing executive salaries. “You guys are running around like you can’t see cutting corporate taxes does nothing but increase the deficit and aid entrenched powers. Ginobili, Gasol, we’ve gone over Citizens United in practice for weeks. Didn’t we study all that video on how the middle class is being gutted? How are you not seeing this?” At press time, Popovich was admonishing the team for not spotting their own complicity in the unequal system while they ran back on defense.
  • Update: I'm one, name's above white cat at left (while this post is top of blog). Bottom of blog always.
  • Nonetheless, fuck the motherfucking Democratic Party, I said to a Hillaryite Colleague yesterday haranguing me for hating motherfucking Democrats.










THE MEADOW

Tom Sleigh

Across the road from where we nap
under a dead elm dazzles the meadow
where the partisans strung the traitors up,
                      
the meadow which their dangling shadows stain.
Belly up in vines a blasted tank
rusts flake by flake to lichened scrap iron
                           
while horseflies harangue
the rippling green, July
a limbo of quavering yellow...
                           
We wake to cattle lowing at dawn,
grass overgrowing summer—so like us
in love each hour with the noonday sun
                      
that neither toils nor spins, its brightness
hovering, blinding us...
What would the dead say if they could see us,
              
lounging, talking, peering through brambles
at cemetery photographs sunk beneath
the undertow of milkweed shadows,
                     
death dates smoothing back into the stone?
I think of Goya’s demon, old man flesh
hanging from his bones, long teeth bared in
              
an ass’s grin as he scrawls on a schoolboy’s
slate, What more can be done? Nothing...
while behind him a noose etched clean as
                  
the moon rises through the inkblot
spiraling back into the hanged man’s mouth
as if blackness poured from his throat:
                  
“When will you tire of us bogeymen,
caricatures of your father’s war,
our crimes half-forgotten, unforgiven?
                  
All future blotted out when they hauled us
from our beds, our minds went dead
to everything but fear: Nightshirts
                    
soaked in snowlight’s pall, we hunched in mud, each step
loud, too loud beside the farmhouse wall,
the seconds teetering till we drop...
                    
What our betrayals were we know
with a knowledge intimate beyond revenge,
history the needle’s eye you can’t squeeze through.
                     
The partisans cut us down, heaped us
in a mass grave our relatives dug up: Yes,
there were tears—even for us...
                         
Now, like aliens from space on your TV shows,
we ravel into mist, surrounding
you the moment your eyes close...
                    
Our pupils search out yours from behind
the mirror with your father’s stares,
fathers and sons melding in one mind—
                         
but who are you to call us traitors, an outsider
judging through the smoke-haze of home:
Each blow exact, our own neighbors
                         
beat us till the blood ran, beat us black
and blue...Even now, would they dare take us back,
older, wiser, necks broken by the yoke?
                          
Moving in time as to a dance we buzz
and swarm across the meadow, dissolving
and glinting like fireflies in the hedge,
                            
blown like milkweed in the moon’s wall eye.
But under your lids, you see us locked in cold,
shattered wheatstraw flecked in ice:
                         
Chill as the night air on your sunburned neck
our eyes like X rays pierce the frost,
stalking every step the living take.”


Friday, August 19, 2016

We Shall Very Soon Have the Pleasure of Recording a Period of Unanimous Tergiversation in This Respect and to Make That Pleasure the Greater, It Is Worth While at the Risk of Tedious Iteration, to Put First Upon Record a Final Protest





Reminder: Fleabus.

  • Tergiversation = evasion of straightforward answer
  • Clabbered = food produced by allowing unpasteurized milk to turn sour at a specific humidity and temperature. Over time, the milk thickens or curdles into a yogurt-like substance with a strong, sour flavor.
  • Spumous = foam or froth on a liquid.
  • Pleonectic = morbidly greedy or covetous

From one paragraph of Jack Cox's Dodge Rose, one of two novels I'm currently reading (de la Pava's A Naked Singularity the other). I'd guessed the first and third, never heard of the second and fourth, can't believe I never heard of the fourth. Dodge Rose whispers, Naked Singularity screams, I'm alternating days. Working so far. Now that I've just jinxed myself. Fuck me.

But yes, this to get to the Ashbery poem I thought of when I saw the word tergiversation in a novel. Oh, and the Taylor Deupree & Marcus Fischer which I bought as my birthday present (it's sometime this month) last night (not yesterday, not today). Also too, get the self-portrait (one person said s/he saw me) off the top.

















THE BUNGALOWS

John Ashbery

Impatient as we were for all of them to join us,
The land had not yet risen into view: gulls had swept the gray steel towers away
So that it profited less to go searching, away over the humming earth
Than to stay in immediate relation to these other things—boxes, store parts, whatever you wanted to call them—
Whose installedness was the price of further revolutions, so you knew this combat was the last.
And still the relationship waxed, billowed like scenery on the breeze.

They are the same aren’t they,
The presumed landscape and the dream of home
Because the people are all homesick today or desperately sleeping,   
Trying to remember how those rectangular shapes
Became so extraneous and so near
To create a foreground of quiet knowledge
In which youth had grown old, chanting and singing wise hymns that   
Will sign for old age
And so lift up the past to be persuaded, and be put down again.

The warning is nothing more than an aspirate “h”;
The problem is sketched completely, like fireworks mounted on poles:   
Complexion of evening, the accurate voices of the others.
During Coca-Cola lessons it becomes patent
Of noise on the left, and we had so skipped a stage that   
The great wave of the past, compounded in derision,   
Submerged idea and non-dreamer alike   
In falsetto starlight like “purity”
Of design that had been the first danger sign
To wash the sticky, icky stuff down the drain—pfui!

How does it feel to be outside and inside at the same time,
The delicious feeling of the air contradicting and secretly abetting
The interior warmth? But the land curdles the dismay in which it’s written   
Bearing to a final point of folly and doom
The wisdom of these generations.
Look at what you’ve done to the landscape—
The ice cube, the olive—
There is a perfect tri-city mesh of things
Extending all the way along the river on both sides
With the end left for thoughts on construction
That are always turning to alps and thresholds
Above the tide of others, feeding a European moss rose without glory.

We shall very soon have the pleasure of recording
A period of unanimous tergiversation in this respect
And to make that pleasure the greater, it is worth while
At the risk of tedious iteration, to put first upon record a final protest:   
Rather decaying art, genius, inspiration to hold to
An impossible “calque” of reality, than
“The new school of the trivial, rising up on the field of battle,   
Something of sludge and leaf-mold,” and life
Goes trickling out through the holes, like water through a sieve,   
All in one direction.

You who were directionless, and thought it would solve everything if you found one,
What do you make of this? Just because a thing is immortal
Is that any reason to worship it? Death, after all, is immortal.   
But you have gone into your houses and shut the doors, meaning   
There can be no further discussion.
And the river pursues its lonely course
With the sky and the trees cast up from the landscape
For green brings unhappiness—le vert Porte malheur.
“The chartreuse mountain on the absinthe plain
Makes the strong man’s tears tumble down like rain.”

All this came to pass eons ago.
Your program worked out perfectly. You even avoided
The monotony of perfection by leaving in certain flaws:
A backward way of becoming, a forced handshake,
An absent-minded smile, though in fact nothing was left to chance.
Each detail was startlingly clear, as though seen through a magnifying glass,   
Or would have been to an ideal observer, namely yourself—
For only you could watch yourself so patiently from afar
The way God watches a sinner on the path to redemption,
Sometimes disappearing into valleys, but always on the way,
For it all builds up into something, meaningless or meaningful
As architecture, because planned and then abandoned when completed,   
To live afterwards, in sunlight and shadow, a certain amount of years.   
Who cares about what was there before? There is no going back,   
For standing still means death, and life is moving on,
Moving on towards death. But sometimes standing still is also life.




Thursday, July 14, 2016

Clawing Back Small Shelter Hung with Screaming




Looked for a book on my shelves for Planet, found my copy of Brothers Karamazov. I just finished Ivan's Rebellion and Grand Inquisitor consecutive chapters. It's been at least a decade since I last read Dostoevsky after decades of reading Dostoevsky. I remembered his horse is the mystery of faith but forgot how relentlessly he tortures the bastard to death and resurrection, exactly what I like to say I need when I pretend I need flogging. Say that guy in the car was broke, broken, had to leave town, loved but must abandon the dog, took the dog to a cul-de-sac in a decent subdivision figuring the dog had a better chance at survival being found by a kid who goes home and says please than if the guy gave the dog to a shelter that kills if dog not adopted in two weeks. The fucking dream starts in the middle and I fucking wake up before I find out his motives - which is to say nothing more than I haven't tortured my faith to death and resurrection in never, though pretend floggings go on daily.








  • Which is to say I'm glad I found the Dostoevsky.
  • Olive and photographer ▲ night before last.
  • Title of today's post from this Tom Raworth poem.
  • Morton Feldman was due here, then I saw the cat:




Monday, July 4, 2016

Some Crank in Me Tightens the Whirly-Spring




Bill wanted to be caught sabotaging the investigation into Hillary's State Dept emails, said someone who would know (I've vouchers), and of course he did. Countless ways exist for Clintons to privately contact AG Lynch and dictate findings if findings are muddy-enough, but the Clinton's don't trust it's muddy-enough so they dispatched the Big Dog to so thoroughly muddy the fucking water it won't settle to bottom until February 2017 (when there will be a new Attorney General, AG Lynch long dead on her sword).

To take full and brutal advantage of this latest incidence of the Clintons' ruthless contemptuousness for whatever anybody fucking thinks, on the day Hillary Clinton not-coincidentally gave her stalled-off as long as she could interview with the FBI, magnifying the import of Bill's meeting with AG Lynch, Donald Trump tweets an image of Hillary Clinton and dollar bills and a Star of David.

The fuck? In real life I had the conversation in the family room of a hospice. Flowers are for Steve.











  • Planet can vouch. I have consciously started driving no more than five miles an hour over the speed limit. I never drive slower than the speed limit. Try it. Watch people drive. Watch people react to your driving non-aggressively, non-angrily: YOU are the problem. It's fascinating. Fine metaphors abound.
  • The Archaeology of Street Names.
  • Maggie's weekly links.
  • { feuilleton }'s weekly links.
  • Someone reminded me of Joan Armatrading. The song there? Reminds me of what I like about Joan Armatrading, what I don't like about Joan Armatrading.
  • The fuck? I picked up a book and next thing I know Father Zossima has died. Katerina Ivananova is an idiot. Ivan is a piece of shit like me. Alyosha is a fool.







EASY AS FALLING DOWN STAIRS

Dean Young

To always be in motion there is no choice
even for the mountain and its frigid
cousins floating on the oceans that even sluggish
seethe and moan and laugh out loud at their own
jokes. How "like the human heart" can be said of
pert near everything, pint of fizz, punching
bag because all moves: the mouse, the house,
the pelt of moon corresponding to the seas
(see above) (now get back here) of mood,
sadness heaving kelp at the sunken city's
face, gladness somersaulting from the eaves
like a kid's drawing of a snowflake. No matter
how stalled I seem, some crank in me
tightens the whirly-spring each time I see
your face so thank you for aiming it
my way, all this flashing like polished
brass, lightning, powder, step on the gas,
whoosh we're halfway through our lives,
fishmarkets flying by, Connecticut,
glut then scarcity, hurried haircuts,
smell of pencils sharpened, striving,
falling short, surviving because we ducked
or somehow got some shut-eye even though
inside the hotel wall loud leaks. I love
to watch the youthful flush drub your cheeks
in your galloping dream. Maybe even
death will be replenishment. Who knows?
Who has the time, let's go, the unknown's
display of emeralds closes in an hour,
the fireworks' formula has changed, will we
ever see that tangerine blue again, factory
boarded up then turned into bowling lanes.



Saturday, August 24, 2013

Something of a Clock Glimpsed in a Dream





Borges born 115 years ago today. Dig these. What did you think ESPN would do when Helmetball said JUMP! said L to K at a special Friday Night Edition of Thursday Night Pints when K offered the story as shuttlecock of a friendly rally. It's the times, I said to K, bruised, everybody's pissed at everybody but mostly pissed at the people they most like and agree with 99.94% of the time. L said, I see what you did there. My phone chirped. A blog friend emailed me, she asked - this is true, she can vouch, or choose not to - and I paraphrase, what the fuck is the Kind? I texted my bud bleggal and existential context in one or two sentence each. I loved With, said L - the Donald Harington novel where Kind has Borgesian onion layers of meaning. If you and me are Kind - I'm talking to you now - I'll buy you a copy of that amazing novel. L's lending K the one I gave her. I've been promising you, I didn't say last night, I'm talking to you now D, love, the traditional Bonnie Prince Billy cascade.











  • Yes, posting on Saturday's in August is proof of compulsive and futile attention sluttery. 
  • On DC history and equality by a friend of mine.
  • BRT.
  • BRT.
  • What you can buy me for my birthday.
  • ZOMG! The Vegans! An argument for. I'm not near, I'm working on in, not to worry, long-timers and loyalists, I'll not be documenting progress towards or retreat from, but I do have a goal.
  • Vegan Symphony #9.
  • 100 free classics. I just finished Silas Marner last night, I forget to bring Vollmann, in the college book store was a Dover edition for $2.50, 150 pages later I remember what I like about Eliot (for intance, her brilliant use of English in her exquisitely constructed aphorisms of moral scolding) and what I didn't like (for instance, the moral scolding).
  • The rage for order.
  • Raskolnikov in Afghanistan?
  • I am alive.
  • Monk, not Meredith per usual, another one.
  • Julianne Barwick interview. Yes, the Evening Planet post will return when one or both of us need it.
  • On Caberet Voltaire.





A COMPASS

Jorge Luis Borges
translated by Robert Mezey

All things are words belonging to that language
In which Someone or Something, night and day,
Writes down the infinite babble that is, per se,
The history of the world. And in that hodgepodge

Both Rome and Carthage, he and you and I,
My life that I don't grasp, this painful load
Of being riddle, randomness, or code,
And all of Babel's gibberish streams by.

Behind the name is that which has no name;
Today I have felt its shadow gravitate
In this blue needle, in its trembling sweep

Casting its influence toward the farthest strait,
With something of a clock glimpsed in a dream
And something of a bird that stirs in its sleep.



Saturday, August 10, 2013

We Were Entering Dark Houses, Always More Dark Houses, Hushed and Abandoned



                 
  • Dance!
  • Non-aargh links seem to be far less read than the aarghful links.
  • Have this aargh one: The Obama years have given us an America that looks something like a bad Kurt Russell movie from the 80s: a weird, garish dystopia, where the president runs a death squad out of the White House, wages robot wars in foreign lands, operates a techno-panopticon sucking up every message, musing and secret desire of the populace, and lets tens of millions of citizens sink into poverty and despair in their gutted communities and crumbling infrastructure while he doles out trillions of dollars to rapacious elites gleefully bleeding the country dry... Add to this such things as the corporate-backed ALEC movement stifling the ability of the people’s elected representatives to pass measures on matters of vital importance to their communities, such as gun violence, pollution, collective bargaining, etc; the return of Jim Crow laws openly designed to rob the dusky races (and poor white trash) of access to the ballot box; the incarceration of a greater percentage of its own population than any regime in human history; the reckless sell-off of public services, public lands and the environment itself to frackers, venture cap vultures and other corporate profiteers; and the relentless persecution of any government employee who dares to inform the people of even a few of the sickening crimes being done in their name. It ain't incrementalism, and it ain't to the left.
  • Found it looking for something else, started rereading for WTF, been a decade or more, the horse killing dream of Raskolnikov, lordy. And it's been such a while since I've read something that's beams and pillars and joists are so right-squared and obvious, is weird, like discovering a new form. Anyway, he's just axed the pawnbroker and her step-sister. The pages and pages of polyphonic splaining are coming, I'll see.
  • OK OK OK, one more: Martin O'Motherfucking O'Malley (trademark claim) campaigns for Cory Motherfucking Booker.
  • UPDATE! OK, one more: Obama thinks you're stupid.
  • Ornery.
  • Fortunately I sat down to consolidate the blogrolls and realized fuck that. There are a couple more new places that were added.
  • A hubristic flea.
  • Creative tyranny.
  • What you can buy me for my birthday
  • Summer at Blue Creek, North Carolina.
  • I like Tanya Donelly's new song better than Neko Case's new song but it's nice to have both.
  • On Benjamin Britten's new biography
  • Gubaidulina.
  • Summer Song.






THE WHITE ROOM

Charles Simic

The obvious is difficult
To prove. Many prefer
The hidden. I did, too.
I listened to the trees.

They had a secret
Which they were about to
Make known to me--
And then didn't.

Summer came. Each tree
On my street had its own
Scheherazade. My nights
Were a part of their wild Storytelling.

We were
Entering dark houses,
Always more dark houses,
Hushed and abandoned.

There was someone with eyes closed
On the upper floors.
The fear of it, and the wonder,
Kept me sleepless.

The truth is bald and cold,
Said the woman
Who always wore white.
She didn't leave her room.

The sun pointed to one or two
Things that had survived
The long night intact.
The simplest things,

Difficult in their obviousness.
They made no noise.
It was the kind of day
People described as "perfect."

Gods disguising themselves
As black hairpins, a hand-mirror,
A comb with a tooth missing?
No! That wasn't it.

Just things as they are,
Unblinking, lying mute
In that bright light--
And the trees waiting for the night.