Thursday, January 8, 2015

Work Today, part one

Dear Jeff, after I asked you to recklessly break copyright last semester as a once-in-a-lifetime I-owe-you-forever favor, and I don't forget that your sole condition was that last semester would represent the only time I would ask you to do so, and I respect that, I really respect that, and I feel bad about this, but I need to know I can count on you again, I can't get sabbatical next semester to finish my book unless I teach this class this semester and if I don't finish my book I don't get tenure and I can't teach this class this semester unless you violate every common sense fence of what constitutes copyright. I'll never ask again, I promise - and I know I promised you last semester I'd never ask you again - but I need you to stream this pirated copy of the biggest Hollywood blockbuster currently in movie theaters. Best regards. P.S. I know you've waived hundreds of dollars in recall fines for me before and I know I agreed to be responsible for all fines hence, but there's a $250 recall on my record, I know it was recalled but my needs have priority over whoever it was who recalled it. There's a block on my record because of the fine, could you waive it please? Thanks. I still owe you that lunch.

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