Saturday, October 28, 2023

There Is No Audience Because There Is No Audience

I am so sideways even after remembering what the United States did to civilians in Dresden and Hiroshima and Nagasaki and North Korea and North and South Vietnam and Iraq and Afghanistan and now Gaza that I'm going to go throw 27 holes at beloved Seneca with Dr Z and SeatSix then drive to Catoctin for a six mile loop by myself. Good news: I deleted and will keep to myself a lengthy monologue on how this genocide was deliberately goaded into action and why now (the West is Cleavon Little in *Blazing Saddles* holding a gun to his head), bad news:

Done two weeks ago, I haven’t painted in two weeks. Clear Elmer’s Glue, gouache, salt, watercolor ink. Scanned first with a work overhead scanner then gently laid face down on a better scanner, it is totally me to 3D shit that don’t represent unless you hold it. Good news: I've deleted and will keep to myself a monologue on why I haven't painted in two weeks and why it's a good thing in the scheme of me. Bad news: nothing but angry links about Joe Biden's genocide of choice in the grid below the song below, good news: this song

"The world has come together to eliminate us"
Rabbis for Ceasefire Now
Joe Biden’s Armageddon, from Gaza to Ukraine
Commence the But-Crackers! It's just a genocide, you fucking breathtakingly stupid holier-than-thou purist poseur
"Israel is so instrumental to the projection of American power abroad that Western powers cannot imagine life without it"
Making Sense of the Establishment News Media’s Distorted Coverage of Gaza
Full-Dress Irrationality, w bullshit
Israel to authorise the firing of live rounds on its own citizens protesting against Netanyahu or for calling for ceasefire
Writers Against the War in Gaza
I am telling you three times both Israel and the US knew the Hamas attack was imminent and WELCOMED it!
Some of the shittiest Zionists are motherfucking American evangelical christer turds and stools
US officials when Ukrainian citizens are murdered versus US officials when Gazan citizens are murdered
In case you were worrying if shitlords and their top lieutenants are running out of money carpetbombing Gaza in prep for WW3 while running an arms market out of Ukraine in prep for WW3, nah, all's good
Support for genocide is now compulsory in Germany
"Artforum firing their editor for signing a letter of support for a Free Palestine while having Black Panther artist Emory Douglas on their cover is peak art world hypocrisy"
Israel Has Permanently Lost The Argument
Malcolm X on the establishment of Israel
The ADL delights in antisemitic incidents and works as hard as it can to generate more (while calling all anti-Zionist protests antisemitism)
Joe Biden Reaches A New All-Time Low
The site of Palestinian-American journalist Shireen Abu Akleh’s killing in Jenin has been bulldozed and her shrine desecrated, in an unexplained early-morning operation on 26 October.
"After they killed Shireen they then beat her pallbearers at the FUNERAL. Then they denied killing her. And now this"
Palestinians are tools that can be disposed of at will and abandoned
Meanwhile, American crackerchristers dream of genociding you and me


Alice Notley

There is
there is
no audience.

So if you speak only to
imagined beings
what does "only" mean?


This building formerly a restaurant . . .
this small room has been scraped of its paint 
and denuded of most former furniture: but 
also it has grown in size—can a building be 
enticed to grow? Because it is now as big as an 
airplane hangar.


          beautiful face 
unbloodied beneath

Mother of flies your
to turn to. If only 
the audience
could see how
you are peaceful and the
languid, glossy

But the audience will still bring
          its own feelings 
to these 

not seeing you
               not seeing 
what I 
am present for.


Who has left me 
here, I have.

Who are your 

            into the 
page if you dare


     Because he invented 
your shape I do mean 

because he invented you badly 

           everything is still hidden.


I was to impale myself on a
steel rod, with a blunt end
                     with a blunt end 
which would make puncture
      more difficult 
and I tried—it's too hard. I can't 
Okay said the voice. I can't 

then I was weeping
                              But it's blood! I'm 
crying blood! I 

That's part of it
said the voice.


I think this is hard.
(That's part of it)

How they prefer him must go.

I think this is difficult singing

Length and repetition 
         create power

If this voice can return like 
         a body

It resembles something that's already been, 



Chestnuts broken
autumnal fungi
so you will remember, that
          it's fall 
         falling. you'll go down

this is no story for the puling
          social classes 
No not at all 
it's for us my familiars say 

who let me weep blood on their ground.


  1. 1/i like the hexjeff - i hope you do more

    2/last night i watched on youtube a tedtalk by catherine ingram - the blurb goes

    “How is it bearable for tender creatures such as ourselves to bear witness to the events of the world”. In this poignant talk, Catherine Ingram draws on her 40 years of experience as a dharma teacher and ex-journalist to give us her practical suggestions to help us cope with a world of intersecting crises. Catherine Ingram is an internationally renowned dharma teacher and former journalist specialising in empathic activism.

    1. ingram says leonard cohen was her mentor, and she felt she could say anything to him, no matter how dark

      in her view his song "the future" - written 30 years ago - was prescient

      nevertheless, it included the line "love's the only engine of survival"

      a performance of that song, by erland ropstad and the salmon smokers, said by some to be the best cover ever, is at

  2. 3/this morning on bbc america cable tv channel a nature documentary stated that 3 of 4 bald eagles in alaska do not survive their first year - but we were shown a clever youngster who presumably was on their way to escaping this fate by scavenging salmon scraps left by bears at night - to avoid having to fight with older, bigger eagles who are roosting safe in treetops - the scene we saw took place in the fall, before eagles migrate southward - the salmon are running so late in the year in the river in question because it is warmed by hot springs

    4/speaking of food, missus charley and i had delicious pears for dessert at lunchtime

    5/buffy st marie - pretendian? to some degree yes, to some other degree no [first nation by blood? apparently not - adopted by a cree family as a young adult? - apparently yes]

    the controversy made me think of kurt vonnegut - upon whom be peace - and then i came across the following, from our friends at wikipedia - my local public library does not have it, alas

    We Are What We Pretend To Be: The First and Last Works is a book by Kurt Vonnegut. Published posthumously in 2013, it contains two novellas that were previously unpublished: Basic Training and If God Were Alive Today. It also contains some reminiscences and commentary by his daughter Nanette. The book's title comes from the preface of the 1966 edition of his novel Mother Night: "We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful about what we pretend to be."

    Basic Training is his first novella (apparently written during the late 1940s), originally intended to be sold under the pseudonym "Mark Harvey."

    If God Were Alive Today is his last novel, which was incomplete at the time of his death in 2007.

  3. The Oldest Friend tells me a story on my birthday as antidote and distraction; it's the kind of thing Thurber would have written about: The Oldest Friend's father, named Mike, was a woodworker / craftsman. One prominent Cousin in his extended family did not like Mike -- but, one year on the cousin's birthday in the 1970's, he presented her with a set of 'knicknack shelves' she could hang on the wall to hold and display small items.

    The Cousin accepted Mike's gift and hung them up. They remained on the wall of the Cousin's home to this day. The Oldest Friend was there recently and stopped to admire her father's work -- he had carved flowers and leaves into each shelf -- and then noticed a familiar shape in one small flower on the lower right portion of one shelf.

    Looking closer, she could see the small 'flower' was actually the face in the famous "Kilroy Was Here" cartoon drawn everywhere American troops had gone in WW2, and that bunches of 'leaves' on each side of the Kilroy face were actually hands, each flipping a viewer the fabled Bird.

    The Oldest Friend was surprised -- then something else caught her attention. She leaned closer and saw in extremely small, faint letters, almost invisible unless you were within a few inches or two of the shelf: Fuck You.

    The Friend absorbed this new display of information about Mike, her father, and remembered that she didn't particularly like the Cousin, either. And it was still funny that the tiny hidden Kilroy and message to the future had gone still unseen after going on 50 years. People are weird.

  4. "I am telling you three times both Israel and the US knew the Hamas attack was imminent..." and THAT's the NICE theory re: what happened. I think things are MUCH closer to what this Anonymous Neocon famously said, as reported by Ron Suskind :

    "The [Anonymous Neocon aide... though these words sound more like Rumsfeld said them than some "aide"] said that guys like me were 'in what we call the reality-based community,' which he defined as people who 'believe that solutions emerge from your judicious study of discernible reality.' [...] 'That's not the way the world really works anymore,' he continued. 'We're an empire now, and when we act, we create our own reality. And while you're studying that reality—judiciously, as you will—we'll act again, creating other new realities, which you can study too, and that's how things will sort out. We're history's actors...and you, all of you, will be left to just study what we do'."

    That was in 2004. Of course that particular ideological growth has metastasized since then. Why would we put ANYTHING past them?