Sunday, October 28, 2018

Maybe God Tried to Turn You Into a Garbage Can

  • That taken by my laptop's camera two nights ago, bigger at the other place.
  • I do not watch screens other than the one displaying what I'm typing or shooting, and for forty years I actively refused until forced, people can vouch, to have my photo taken, 
  • but (your mileage may vary) my favorite writing lately is photographing me.
  • I made reservations for three nights in a chain hotel in Jackson Michigan, we got there, no reservations, no available rooms,
  • I called the chain's headquarters from the lobby of the chain hotel in Jackson Michigan and chain said no reservations, no available rooms,
  • I said you see no payments from this specific credit card? and all said, no.
  • On Monday I get the email every hotel chain sends with a survey, how was my stay.
  • On Monday one night of stay in the chain hotel in Jackson Michigan appears on credit card.
  • On Monday, when I called the chain hotel in Jackson Michigan to please confirm to the credit card company that I did not stay in the chain hotel in Jackson Michigan and OK to remove the charge and return me my money the person on the phone at the chain hotel in Jackson Michigan said she could neither see I had a reservation but confirmed I spent a night even though all rooms were booked and my name doesn't appear as a guest.
  • There's more, lots, stupider.
  • I can be the guy in the photo above, effectively, people can vouch, but only in these situations, I hope I haven't looked at you like that.
  • We are being reprogrammed:
  • I haven't called to bark when once I'd love to bark (people can vouch), I
  • (there's more, lots, stupider)
  • don't want to bark anymore even in these situations,
  • bark don't .
  • A davidly production:


Dean Young

Because we are so stupid,
the prizes in Cracker Jacks are now paper
so they can be swallowed, ladders
spackled with warnings. No getting
within a hundred feet of Stonehenge because
everyone wants to hack off a souvenir
and the way home is clogged to one lane
so whoever wants to can stare into a pothole
until coming up with a grievance. I’d vote
the greatest accomplishment of mankind
is the pickle spear. God created paradise
to tell us Get out! which is why we probably
created God who doesn’t much like being created
by ilk like us. No wonder it’s pediatrics
every morning and toxicology by happy hour.
Is it all in the mind, the dirty, dirty mind?
Maybe God tried to turn you into a garbage can
so you could be lifted by the truck’s hydraulic
arms and banged empty. Maybe a snow cone
so you could be sticky-sweet and dropped.
Maybe a genital-faced bivalve to be dashed
with Tabasco and eaten whole or, to his glory,
produce a pearl.

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